Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Can Men And Women Be Friends?
Researchers are studying heterosexual men and women in platonic friendships to see how sturdy those friendships are and whether both sides are on the same page. The answers they're finding are noteworthy. Let me quote directly from a recent report:
"The results suggest large gender differences in how men and women experience opposite-sex friendships. Men were much more attracted to their female friends than vice versa. Men were also more likely than women to think that their opposite-sex friends were attracted to them—a clearly misguided belief. In fact, men’s estimates of how attractive they were to their female friends had virtually nothing to do with how these women actually felt, and almost everything to do with how the men themselves felt—basically, males assumed that any romantic attraction they experienced was mutual, and were blind to the actual level of romantic interest felt by their female friends. Women, too, were blind to the mindset of their opposite-sex friends; because females generally were not attracted to their male friends, they assumed that this lack of attraction was mutual. As a result, men consistently overestimated the level of attraction felt by their female friends and women consistently underestimated the level of attraction felt by their male friends."
These findings make sense to me. They match my understanding of how men think. Do they correlate to your experiences?