Wednesday, January 23, 2013

If I Were A Boy...

There's a meme going around among female bloggers, imagining what life would be like if they were boys.  The bloggers mention things that guys do which they envy, like peeing standing up and not worrying about gaining weight.  They also say they'd be nicer to women than most guys are, projecting an awareness of women's struggles into male brains.

I first saw my friend Bailey do this and then visited other blogs I haven't seen before (like this and this).

What do you think life would be like for you if you were a boy?  What would you enjoy about it?  What would you miss?

36 comments:

  1. Hmm...definitely being able to pee standing up would be a plus and not having to go through that time of the month. Aside from those two things, I like being a girl :) I like the song "If I Were a Boy" by Beyonce. Have you heard it?

    Heather

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    1. Yes -- and I think that's what started the meme.

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  2. I don't think i would like to be a boy. I think it would be kind of boring.

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  3. I'd definitely enjoy the whole peeing-standing-up thing. Also: being able to just roll out of bed, get dressed and be ready to go. No makeup, no hair styling. And I've always wondered what sex feels like for guys...it has to be different, right?

    I probably would find it pretty inconvenient to not be able to carry a purse, though. I love my holds-everything-under-the-sun bag!

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  4. Hm I guess that the only thing different is that I won't wear cute dresses? I don't know, sometimes Moreno tells me that I think like a boy on certain things :D the only thing i'm sure about is that I'd have the same interests and hobbys (maybe style blogging too!)

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  5. Hmm, I know I wouldn't miss "that time of the month" and all that goes along with it! I'd love being able to be physically stronger, because I am such a weakling. Beyond that, I can't think of anything really. Like the song says "I enjoy being a girl!"

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  6. Having attempted to live life as a teenage boy/young man for several years I can say for sure that there is a certain freedom that comes with being male. There is increased safety in masculinity. No degrading hollering, no inappropriate touches in public, and much less harassment. It's amazing.

    I also experienced increased self-confidence, because there was less societal pressure to look a certain way to be attractive. Getting ready to step out was amazingly easy in comparison and "Does this look okay?" never made its way out of my mouth.

    My strong personality was acceptable while in my male attire, as were my opinions and somewhat deep voice. However I've found that as a woman other women come to dislike me for these very reasons. In my experience pretending to be demure seems to be the only way to gain female acceptance.

    What would I miss about being female? Being able to openly emote without criticism as well as enjoying beauty and finery.

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  7. life would be so much easier if I were a boy. but I love my makeup and hair products too much :-)

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  8. If I were a boy, I would probably walk around with a boner 99.9% of the time.

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  9. Hmmm... ready for my over-thought-out ramblings?
    If we accept the premise put forth by Judith Butler that gender is performative, we do have to separate the biological implications of gender and stereotypical ideals associated with gender and gender performance. Biologically, there would be differences, but I'd take self-contained genitalia and food-producing glands over waggly bits. I am infinitely in awe of my husband, who can lift heavy boxes and open jars without a struggle, despite not being what is considered a strong person.
    In terms of gendered behaviour, and personality, I resist the concept that these are inherently linked to biological factors but rather that they are strictly performative, but are reinforced as inherent to gender by society. I may cry at the drop of a hat, but so did a boyfriend of mine in high school. Did people pick on him? Yes. Did people pick on me? Yes, though not to the same extent. I was labelled "sensitive" while he was labelled "a girl". He loathed dressing up, crafted swords, drove trucks and played hockey -- while not necessarily all stereotypically masculine hobbies, they are still masculine. Having ONE female characteristic stands out more than having ALL REMAINING male characteristics. While I like to believe the natural universe around us at least has some logic, targeting a male for one female characteristic does not seem natural.
    To a degree, I applaud the family who made news a number of months ago for not announcing the gender of their child. While ultimately, there is a physical indicator of gender (and I know this is where knowing the difference between one's sex and one's gender would be good to know), they are recognizing the social prescriptions associated with gender and rather than subjecting their child to the ridicule of perhaps not subscribing to these "norms," they are drawing the focus to themselves, and to society's not-always-so-logical definitions. That being said, it's a bit too radical for our society, given how ingrained these notions are. I'm currently watching French-Canadian TV show called La galere which has a family where the boy is named Camille and the girl is named Fred. Despite these obvious subversions of gendering of names, the family is horrified when Camille, the son, takes an interesting dancing, Barbies and skirts. Entirely hypocritical.
    I prefer to think of these performative expressions to be more akin to personal identity than personal gender. There are many times when you mention enjoying a particularly feminine act, which you relish in as a moment when you can embrace you femininity which is entirely foreign to me, a genetic and self-identifying female. That does not mean that it is not feminine, does not allow you to embrace your femaleness,nor does it suggest that I'm masculine or lacking femininity in any way. It just means we are different. The whole idea of dichotomies suggest we live in a very black and white world, which we all know is not the case. My own personal belief is that we all reside within a certain liminality, and the only way to avoid the confusion which comes from social prescriptions of gender is to eradicate these apparent polarities from our discourse.
    And now I'll put my soap box away, and end with
    But seriously, how awesome would it be to pee standing up!?!?

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    1. Brilliant and interesting thoughts. Thank you for sharing them. And thanks for ending with humor. :)

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  10. Gah, I would love a million things like facial hair ( though i hate it rubbing against my face), eating whatever i want, and not really worrying about getting dressed. Though I would miss my clothes, although I probably could still wear them...


    Xo Megan, www.TfDiaries.com

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  11. I would like to be able to be scruffy and put on a suit and look amazing. I would like to walk down the street, particularly at night and not need to be aware of where and how everyone was standing/moving. I might travel to India by myself. I might be able to progress higher is jobs? I don't really know. I think I rather like being a girl though. Dresses and heels, female friendships, and I can still watch hockey and drink beer with the boys!

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  12. There isn't a thing on my body that I'd miss if I were a boy because I've been so non-feminine shaped all along. But possibly my hair, though I would have long hair if I was a guy. And I do love men's clothing, especially their well made wingtip shoes. I would also like to experience being a parent without having to be the mom. Partially due to labor, but also just the role of father.
    Great post Ally!

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  13. Honestly, I'd probably be a misogynistic ass.

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  14. Pretty sure I'd still pee sitting down if I were a guy. However I do love men's fashion quite a bit. Everything seems so much sleeker. Sure you guys often pay more, but the clothes are less fast fashion than female clothes. It's easy for guys to look good in a suit.

    And don't forget not having a period or worrying about pregnancy (in your own body).

    I'd miss a lot of things about being a girl. Some things just tend to be awarded based on gender (certain jobs for guys for example)... I like being offered the front passenger seat, people holding the door or taking that extra step. I like feeling like a lady.

    I suppose I'm also grateful because I grew up as "one of the guys" - since I've started dressing differently I've hit some glitches where I'm no longer treated like "one of the guys". Interesting to think about.

    There are benefits to all genders, and struggles too.

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  15. If I were a boy, no one would tell me I look sick without make-up.

    But I'd miss the easy cover-up on bad skin days.

    I'd be stronger.

    But then I'd miss letting everyone else pick up the heavy stuff.

    I would be nice and a good listener. I'm pretty sure.

    I'd miss being nice and a good listener?

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  16. This is a great question. I don't even have to think about it. I've always wanted to road trip across country by myself. But I'm never going to do it. Because I'm terrified. As a small racially ambiguous woman (who looks 16) I'm just too worried I would be placing myself in a very dangerous position if I did so. If I attracted the wrong attention (from a man or group of men) I would never be able to defend myself. You know what I mean?

    A friend of mine from college spent six months traveling the US on his motorcycle in 2007. He stayed at ashrams in New Mexico and visited Indian reservations in South Dakota and even lived on the beach in Southern California for a while. He seemed so free. To this day I'm so immensely envious of his experience. It changed his life. He lived my dream and I'll just have to live vicariously through him, I guess.

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    1. That's so sad, buddy. I hope you'll consider doing the trip with a friend. Better that than not going.

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  17. When I was a little girl I really related to my older brothers and wanted to be like them. I think because they were allowed to be so relaxed about the way they dressed. I would watch my sisters get ready for dates and the hair dryers, eyelash curlers and complicated undergarments (this was the '60s) intimidated me. By contrast my brothers would come down to breakfast in an undershirt and jeans. I tried this one morning and was sent back upstairs to get dressed properly! I guess this is a long winded way of saying I would like the freedom that men have to toss something on and go,without all the extra getting ready.

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    1. Good point. From your reference, you sound about the same age as me; I also grew up in the Sixties.

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    2. I turned 50 last year. Eek!

      Bonnie

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  18. If I were a boy I'd probably be a screaming queen and transition back to female. Well, maybe after seeing just how massive I could get my arm muscles to be. That does sound like fun.

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    1. All teenage boys try to pump up their biceps. It's a real guy-thing. :)

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  19. Hhmm, have not thought about this! I love being a woman, except the fact of menstrual months, childbirth, and being perceived to be ultra emotional at times vs. a man! I'd probably still wear lace though, haha!

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  20. I'd be a bad ass (joking) :). Truthfully, I'm quite content being a female, not to mention at the rate that we are evolving (thank goodness) equality is becoming a given.

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  21. I usually like being a girl, but I do wish I looked more like a boy. My ideal looks in fashion are more androgynous and sometimes I hate that I can't look that way (curls and curves- I'm definitely a girl).

    I have so much to say about this, but being shy I won't.

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  22. Even better than the peeing-standing-up biz would be never having to wait in line to use the restroom. :)
    I'd also enjoy wearing men's clothes. They seem higher quality and more comfortable.
    I'd also enjoy the experience of having physical power and presence. It'd be fun to have a bigger appetite, too.
    I would miss the ability to wear lipstick, eyeshadow, mascara, etc. and all those pretty clothes.
    Another thought-provoking blog post, Ally! :)

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  23. YES, not waiting in line for the restrooms would be fantastic. I think having the physical strength would also be cool.
    But other than that I am not sure. I am pretty happy about being a girl! :)

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  24. What a fascinating meme, I'd not caught wind of it before this post. In a way I feel like this is a hard question to answer off the top of my head. Being a woman is something I cherish, and though there are elements that I'd happily forgo (e.g., cramps) there are so many thanks that I couldn't fathom giving up.

    I think that if I woke up as a man tomorrow, what would be most interesting is that I would probably feel more confident (I'm not implying in any way that women as a whole are less confident than men, I just think that I'd be more confident if I was a man) and also safer (again, not that I fear all men, I don't at all, but if I was a man I'd probably be bigger, stronger and better able to physically defend myself).

    Again, it's a really interesting topic and one that I'm sure I'll keep thinking about throughout the day and beyond.

    ♥ Jessica

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