April Fool's Day

One of our fondest family traditions is me playing April Fool's jokes on Robin. 

Every year I amazingly manage to succeed in fooling Robin even though she knows a prank is coming and looks for it with every fiber of her being. Robin hates being fooled -- hence, my pleasure -- but loves ingenuity and attention. In the span of a minute Robin's mind races from puzzlement to surprise to annoyance to appreciation, usually with profanity erupting.

If April 1st ever arrived without a joke, Robin would be very sad. She would interpret that as "the honeymoon is over."

In the past I've devised many methods for evading her anticipation: coming out of left field; misdirection; deception. Occasionally I enlist friends to act as accomplices to throw Robin off-track. This year I concocted a simple plan founded on none of these techniques; rather, it exploits one of Robin's daily habits.

Because she'll be on high alert for any action I personally take, the joke has to arrive from another direction. Right now Robin shops online and gets regular delivery of packages from Amazon, et al. In this habit lies my plan.

Instead of me "doing something," a box will simply appear on our front doorstep. Like hundreds of others preceding it. Nothing suspicious there. The box -- large in size -- will capture her attention and stimulate her interest. Robin loves guessing what's in her packages even when the purchases are as pedestrian as paper towels. She enjoys "unboxing" things. It's like Christmas for a Jewish kid.

To allay doubt I created a fake mailing label using an old vintage typewriter a friend gave me last year. The box and its label look utterly ordinary. Unremarkable.

The essence of this year's joke isn't the box or what's inside it; the joke centers on the unboxing process itself.

During the past two months I collected a dozen cardboard boxes of every size. I didn't have to buy any; I just quietly put aside boxes arriving with Robin's purchases and diverted them from being thrown out. Yesterday I selected six of these boxes that neatly nestle inside one another. Like iconic Russian stacking dolls. The outside box is large (3 ft. x 3 ft. x 3 ft.) and the smallest one inside is only 10 inches by 10 inches by 3 inches. 

Okay, so now you see where I'm going with this. On April 1st Robin will discover a big box on our front steps. She'll be delighted and wonder what's inside. She'll then open the box and see another box. Scratching her head she'll open that box and... what? Another box? She'll continue unboxing until she eventually realizes she's being pranked. I'm taking bets on how many boxes she has to open before a light bulb goes off. :)

To sweeten the joke, inside the last box is a pretty hand-made sign I created. The sign has a message on it and can later be displayed. It wishes Robin a Happy April Fool's Day with the year noted. This will hopefully melt the heart of an infuriated woman. Cooling off is required as the last part of an effective 4/1 joke.

Robin doesn't read my blog so -- shhh -- please keep this a secret. :)