Friday, March 21, 2014

Absurd? Maybe Not

There's a comedian who was popular in the Eighties whose name is Steven Wright.  He's still around but not as well-known now.

Steven's performances are unusual.  He tells jokes in a dead monotone, focusing all attention on his material.  His jokes are about absurd ideas -- but if you think about them, they contain a kernel of truth.  That contrast creates humor.

Rather than describe Steven's material, let me give you some of his observations:

I was wondering how my life would have been different if I'd been borne one day earlier.  Then I thought maybe it wouldn't have been different other than I would have asked that question yesterday.

It was the first time I was ever in love.  I learned a lot.  Before then, I never even thought about killing myself.

I went to the supermarket today.  I picked up some milk and went up to the register and I said, "Hi.  How are you?" and she said "Will that be all?" and I said, "No, I want to buy this."

Next week I'm going to have a MRI to find out if I have claustrophobia.

A friend of mine has a trophy-wife but apparently it wasn't First Place.

I bought a new camera.  It's very advanced.  You don't even need it.

I bought an iPod.  It can hold 5,000 songs or one telephone message from my mother.

You know, if heat rises, Heaven might be hotter than Hell.

My doctor told me I shouldn't work out any more until I'm in better shape.

One of my grandfathers died when he was a little boy.

I was driving down the highway and saw a guy hitchhiking.  He had a sign that said "Heaven."  So I hit him.

You know, the Earth is bipolar.

She was a mail-order bridesmaid.

She drank so much she slurred her pauses.

She was studying forensic astronomy.

I'm writing an unauthorized autobiography.


Have you heard of Steven Wright?  Do you think any of these jokes are funny?


  1. No I had never heard of him before. IN that picture he looks like he could be a character in a Dickens story. I did find most of those jokes funny actually. I love dry humour. Thanks for sharing it! I hope you're having a good weekend.

    1. I love all those one-liners - and that is all you can really call them, as a joke is a little story with a punchline. I wish I could memorise them. It's like "I used to do stand-up - until they asked me to sit down" or "I used to be on the stage - the stage coach out of town".

      Did you hear about the guy who fell out a second storey window? A policeman runs over and asked what happened. The man said "I don't know officer, I just got here myself". I do love nonsense. :-)

  2. That's too bad that I'd never heard of him before this post. He's funny! Is it just me or are today's comedian's too vulgar? It seems that most lack the intelligence and wit to make a clever joke, so they resort to vulgarity. It's hard to find a great comic...but Steven sounds hilarious. And I'm glad you described his style before you gave an example of his work. Don't know why, but I've always liked hearing jokes from a monotone voice lol. I think it adds to the hilarity in a way.


    1. Steven's delivery definitely enhances his jokes.

  3. I remember him. I thought he was very funny, but then I appreciate that very dry kind of humor.

  4. Cool guy, good sense of humour! (great actually). Thanks for introducing us to his work!

    p.s. - One of my favourite stupid jokes ever: One guy says to his friend "I'm seeing red and white dots". The friend asks "Did you see an ophthalmologist"? and he replies "No, just dots".
    p.s.2 - Glad you're back on your feet!! Hugs xx

  5. Ahah xD
    "You know, the Earth is bipolar." XD

    I have def heard of him, but I must check him out again :D

  6. I have not heard of him but his material is brilliant.
    It's smart!

  7. I love Steven Wright! I read all of those in his voice. Thanks for treat this morning!

  8. Lol! I hadn't heard of him. I actually knew very little about stand-up comedy until meeting my husband. I admit, I have a thing for intelligent humor, good (or really bad) puns, and non-vulgar humor. I like being able to relate to my comedy, but also enjoy the bits that are a little more learned than some comedy is.

  9. I like a lot of those, and I didn't know his name but I knew him by face when I saw the picture. I used to spend too much time as a kid watching comedy revues on VH1 when it mostly still played music.

  10. haha, i LOVE these! i don't recognize the name, but his face does look familiar.

  11. There's a classic, old school sort of quality to witty one liners like these. They make me think, in particular, of Henny Youngman and his endearingly famous "take my wife, please" quip.

    ♥ Jessica

  12. Oh my gosh! Pat (my boyfriend) and I love him! His jokes are pretty funny, and him speaking in a monotone voice sort of adds to the hilarity. We love stand up comedy. Have you heard of Nick Swardson? He's my all time favorite. Most people probably think he's stupid, or don't understand his comedy. It's raunchy, but he's also very expressive (like me) when he talks. He just cracks me up!

  13. I haven't heard of him but his work sounds really good ... I like clever comedians.

  14. I have heard of him and even saw him on TV, but it's been too long ago that I remembered, until now. What a Brilliant Comic, I Love his Style and yes, it's all quite Hilarious and Unique! Dawn... The Bohemian