Ask Pandy

 

Two years ago, I found Pandy at a Summer festival in Long Beach.

He was lonely and we became friends.  I carried him home on my motorcycle

and he loves to ride.  Pandy is a great companion.

 

Since then I've learned Pandy is a natural advisor.

When I have a problem, he has an answer.  I thought I'd let Pandy

answer some of your questions, so here we go!

 



Dear Pandy,

I'm going to a party where there will be lots of smart people.  I'm not completely dumb but I'm not as bright as these super-geeks.  I mean, like, the only news I get is what I see on Twitter and I'm feeling a little intimidated.  Is there something I can say to impress these smarty-pants? Signed, Awed.

 

Dear Awed:

First off, don't worry.  Intelligence is not the measure of a man.  (Or a woman.)  While it's nice to be educated and informed, there are many unpleasant smart people.  Just as there are sweet dumb people.  So be nice and that will carry you most of the way.  If you need a comment to carry you over the goal-line, just mention that "Bitcoin is a disruptive technology that will re-shape American commerce."  Nobody will know what you're saying but everyone will think you're smart.

 

Dear Pandy,

I love my boyfriend but there's a problem.  He's started staying over my apartment and we now share a bathroom.  I worry about him hearing me through the bathroom door so I'm quiet when I get down to business.  He, however, has no inhibitions.  Sometimes, I need to put on loud music to drown out his icky noises.  Plus, we once took a shower together and I was shocked to see where he puts the soap.  What can I do?  Signed, Grossed Out

 

Dear Grossed Out:

Some boys aren't taught how to behave in front of others so it may not be his fault.  But that doesn't excuse his habits or mean they should go uncorrected.  Try to gently suggest ways he can improve.  If he does, great; if not, realize he'll be this way forever.  Most of all, buy two bars of soap, one for him and one for you.