Sharing my thrift-store finds is the most pleasurable aspect of these efforts. Being free to gush about the beauty of a piece, examine how it looks on my odd cylindrical frame, hear and consider your feedback on how the presentation can be improved are all sweet songs to my ears. They reach deep inside me and feed my under-nourished soul.
Casual emotional support that's common in female company is unknown to most transgender women. In public, we're compelled to adopt unnatural poses; in private, we despair from loneliness. Only recently did I find solace through online connection. In real life, I'm still rarely able to share my nature and interests with others. Only after careful vetting do I find the rare few who will tolerate and accept my gender non-conformity.
But back to happy stuff!
Lately I've been shopping at a new thrift-store (Rosie's Vintage). I've have found several pretty dresses and cool antiques there. You've seen some of them here and here. Last week I leapt with joy at seeing a vintage dress from the 1950's on the rack. Its style is very dated and never worn today, which makes it more fun to don, not less.
I was also thrilled to have a brief conversation with the store's friendly owner, Thea. She made me comfortable enough to mention my blog. Thea is the rare exception I note above; someone friendly and non-judgmental. Our conversation meant something to me. Having an opportunity to be open about myself is, really, all I want in life. Nothing more, just that.
We all want to be accepted for who we are, don't you think?
Well, I just had a v female reaction to hearing about you finding a vintage dress. My immediate response was to request your measurements... Usually rude to ask, but I am a vintage clothes seller and it was the current topic of blogger post! Also, not usually done in public, but I wanted to acknowledge the inclination to you as what is usually a typical female experience for me just so you know.
ReplyDeleteHope this makes sense! :)
Oh, that's so sweet! Thank you. My true measurements are 42-42-42, although I usually increase my bust a few inches with breast-forms. My height (6') makes most clothes designed for women look short on me but I delight in how high hems show off my legs. :-)
DeleteYES!!!! Your legs! That's what this look is missing. It's too long, or rather too in between. If you had this shortened to maybe 2-3" above the knee it'd be amazing on you.
DeleteU look great btw!
ReplyDeleteDanke!
DeleteWhat an unusual and pretty dress! As to people being non-judgmental... my experience is that women can also be incredibly mean and cliquey. I never expect kindness as a matter of course from anyone (male or female), I always think everyone has a hidden agenda. But maybe it's just me being neurotic...
ReplyDeleteUnusual, yes! That aspect appeals to me. You won't find this style at Forever 21. :-)
DeleteI understand your distrust of others, Tiina. Bad experiences will instill that in us. I've had such experiences and try, despite them, to cling to a Pollyanna-ish faith in humanity.
Yellow is a great color on you! And I know it is hard to trust other people, I'm glad you found someone you could open up to at the shop.
ReplyDeleteThat really is a find. It is a pretty dress that looks like it would be a complete pleasure to wear. I am not sure if it works best with the sandals you have on and I would consider some nude or beige pumps.
ReplyDeleteI do share the sentiments that you note in this post. It is frustrating to not be able to dress as we want, when we want, etc. We live with a secret that we cannot disclose to friends, family, etc. and there is a mental price that we pay to keep this part of our lives in the closet.
We can talk about sports, politics, even religion...but we dare not get involved in discussions about fashion, dresses, makeup and shoes, etc..
On Saturday I put on a very flimsy lined floral dress to be in sync with the dresses worn by the ladies at the Kentucky Derby. I also had a nice pair of black and white patent 3" pumps that went well with the dress. I do not have any ladies hats. I was nicely dressed and watching the Ranger game that preceded the Derby.
My ever perceptive wife reminded me of a recent Auto train ride where we were having dinner with two southern women who were discussing their ideas for their Derby dresses. My wife was able to join a small bit of their discussion while I sat there listening in my role as the bored disinterested husband. My wife knew that I would have enjoyed joining the Derby dress conversation.
Oh well...such is the life of a closeted CD.
Pat
I hear ya, Pat. So often I feel compelled to remain quiet when I wish I could join in female conversation.
DeleteThis is a pretty dress, I love the top part, the lace overlay is something I would wear in a heartbeat- the bottom I would probably have altered to be a straight hem.
ReplyDeleteI think that being accepted is a life quest..
Thanks, Lorena!
DeleteThat is wonderful the store's owner made you feel comfortable enough to chat about your blog. I honestly have a tough time saying that I write a blog when I meet people, as it tends to be met with a raised eyebrow when I do. But the online world can be so wonderful! I'm so happy you've found so many great online connections too. :) Your dress was a beautiful find! So unique! And yellow looks lovely on you. :)
ReplyDeleteThank you Lindsey for the nice words.
DeleteYellow! I need more yellow in my wardrobe- you look great in this color! And I'm so glad that you met Thea + she made you feel comfortable!
ReplyDelete-Ashley
Le Stylo Rouge
Thanks, Ashley. YOU make me feel comfortable. :-)
DeleteWe can be twinsies if I wear my vintage yellow dress!
ReplyDeleteHow fun that you found a place to shop in that is accepting of you and also has such brilliant vintage! I'm sure I'd love that store.
The dress is very feminine and you look so happy in it. I like the lace shawl with polkadots (I adore polkadots!).
bisous
Suzanne
Yes, let's be twin sisters!
DeleteI love this pretty dress - it's so very girly. :) What a nice thing to meet a shop owner who's open-minded!
ReplyDeleteI thought of you when I saw that we nearly elected our first transgender person this week: http://www.metronews.ca/news/vancouver/2017/05/10/vancouver-false-creek-morgane-ogen-sam-sullivan.html
I hope we see more progress and changes in the years to come.
This is why I respect you so much, Sheila.
DeleteOh what a fun dress! I like this color on you. Yes thrift stores can be so fun. And yeah Paper Doll is so well curated, I could see you in a lot of the threads they carry.
ReplyDeleteAllie of
www.allienyc.com
I wanna buy half the store!
DeleteThis dress is so adorable, I so wanna go thrifting with you! Promise we'll go together one day =) Kisses
ReplyDeleteFashion and Cookies - fashion & beauty blog
We will, Vale, we will!
DeleteYou look so pretty in this awesome find!
ReplyDeleteI have never anything like this. And odly enough it really suits you. It has a certain sweetness about it. I like it.
ReplyDeleteAnd I am so glad you found an accepting soul in that shop. I bet you will be there more often.
Greetje
That yellow dress is so sweet!
ReplyDeleteThat is a lovely lovely dress. Straight out of a novel. :)
ReplyDeleteShopping is so much fun. If I am truly in a shopping mood especially in discount stores I prefer to shop solo to focus. But for mall shopping and window browsing I love to do with friends or my two favorite shopping partners my mom and my lil sis!
The dress is so cute!! It suits you!
ReplyDeletexx
Mónica Sors
MES VOYAGES À PARIS
NEW POST: CALIFORNIA DAYS... IN N OUT
Couldn't agree more. Finding our people and those who accept us just the way we are... well you can't ever put a value on that kind of friendship <3 I love you just the way you are, Ally, and this dress is so unique and perfect for you!
ReplyDeletethat dress is wonderful! Actually, it reminds me of my country, the Philippines! :) It looks similar to our baro't saya :D
ReplyDeletexoxo, rae
http://www.raellarina.net/
Yes, it does! Thanks for the reference.
DeleteAbsolutely nothing wrong with enjoying vintage. I remember being wildly obsessed with tie dye and bell bottoms in the early/mid 90s despite straight legs being the core look.
ReplyDeleteBest part of modern fashion is that there is now an 'anything goes' idea of what fashion is. In the immortal words of Tim Gunn, make it work.
Tie-dye and bell bottoms?! Those are MY clothes!
DeleteThat's wonderful that you were able to tell her about your blog!!! This is a really unusual dress, it reminds me of older glamorous films!x
ReplyDeleteI love the top of the dress but agree with some of the girls that I would make the hem straight ... You look so happy in this dress Ally.
ReplyDeleteWe definitely all want to be accepted for who we are ... We just need to find those who matter and those who don't ... just don't (even though it hurts a bit!)